the RAEAL homestake stori
by MalonaWyesnfIsGOG
Summary: what RAELLY happiened in homestook? hussei is a fuckign LIAR! find out waht REALLY appened! tail of luv and tradgdgegeyyeyegegy! death and life! and sexy sexxxxxx ;)


Once open a tiem, Karkit decided he was gona achieve gods tear. He'd given up on his popes and drams of doing it swoops ago but now was THE TIME. He couldn't stand how everyoned laughed at him bcuz of it and he was sick of everyone googling Vriska because of her amazing cool yellow pj's. Even Tarzani wanted to lick it. It was so unfear.

Trolls don't have a concet of sexulity but damn Terezi sure wha s a lebanese someties. And Kanyanyan but that was ok cuz shes datin Roes and Roes aint a troll. They had spent so much time insid the season and had lot of his friends had gotten very powerful since their first time getting in. He had decidd it it was goin to happen to day. He would sleep on his quest circle and awake a god team night of blue. TAKE THAT HUSSIE! (karkat is my fave troll don't judge! i find it unfair that he didn't get the tear :( )

Anyway Karkat decided to opin a pesterlog and talk to his friend Nepeta before he made his desisionn. He new he could trust her bcuz she has a crush on him and it was obvious (nepkat 4 lyfe) and she was alweys very naic to himn. He begain takling to her and basically this is what happen:

carciniGeneticals began pestering arselickCatnip

CG: NEPITA!  
>AC: B33 *ac pawndered the words on her scream, what is it karkate?*<p>

CG: WHY IS UR NAME ARSELICK?

AC: B33 *ac revels that she has made some new lifesytle choises, infect she isn't called nepeta anymoar, her new name is nepussy and she wishes her friends would respect that, she said cooly in the 3rd prison*

CG: WHAT THE UCK? NEPUSYS? WAT? WHATEVER THE FUCK, NEVERMIND. I'M GOING GOD TIER AND I'K ABOIUT TO DIE! IS THIS A GOD IDEA?

AC: B33 *ac papss karkittens sholder and lets him now deth is a jurney he will return from*

CG: THANK YOU. THAT RALLY HELSPS.

AC: B33 *thats becuz im the best*

AC: B33 *SHIT I MEAN*

AC: B33 *ac corrects herself and sayz it's bcuz she's the best. now she has to go beclawz equiors is peesting her and he gets mad when she dosnt rtesponed*

arsenicCatnip ceasered pesting carcinoGenocide.

Equius was oh so horney after hearing that his dear moiriaialwas changed her name to Nepussy. He neededd a way to get out his sevxual urges. But he didn't want to toych his bulgdge directly bc dats gay. Not that he knew a what gay was. He rgrabbeded a towel and started shoiving it his njook. he had to be CURFULED bc if he fucked up he woudl assidentally SMASH HIS NOOK and bleed errwhere. once it was good and deep he used his STRENGTH to pull it out and it felt so good. althugh he did it a bit too hard and he got towael burn (like rope burn but with towels xD). He warpped the toewel around his buldge and started to fucik it. i gave him towel burn on budlegel but he didnt care. it was so lood that he camede all over a horse poestwtetr and the thought of cumming on a reel hourrse made made him orogaism again. he then pasrted out and slept for 100 hours bc masturbation is harad wok.

Nepussy wolked into the room after eEquiuers was asleep for a few hours and saw the mess and left. tramatized. furever.

whenever he wokeded up he realized that he belly was a bit bigger tahn it had been before he masterbated. he thought that it was because he hadnt been exercizing a lot lately so he started to **SMASH SOME ANUSES** jk he just beat up some robots. he excersize ruitime become more vigorous than ever but he was getting gfatter and fatter. it made him v worrrried he decided to talk to nepussy aboot this.

centaurrsTestical started presterin arselickCatnep

D- Nepeta

D - I mean Nepussy

D- I am a bit concerned

:33 if this is abot my name you can furrick off u crispy nipple

D - No no im talking of something else

D - I've been gaining a lot of wieght as of late

D - And I've been having weird food cravings...

:33 did you have the sexysex recently?

D- WHAT? DO YOU THINK IM SOME SORT OF BABRBARAIN?

:33 ima take that as a no

:33 but you should probs take a pregocy test to make sure tho

:33 ah fuck im gettin pestereded by some asshat. talk ta ya laters

arselickCatnip ceased perestering centarsTesttical

Equis was wored bc he migh be pregnacy. He pacded around thr room and thught about what ot do. he decided to take the test. he went did the appearify thingy ad make a pregococy test appear and he peed on it. his peeing was so STRONG tht it blow a whole in his floor. surprisingy the test stuick didnt br8k. he looked at the thingy and it had a plusu sign.

equius zahzahj is progot.

_okai guys tell me what cha thought xD _


End file.
